Alright, so once my Dad won the jackpot in and office lottery that offices sometimes have. The jackpot consisted of ten tickets to Hawaii, plus five thousand dollars pocket money for the trip. My Dad packed us all up-him, my Mom, me, Granny Granny, Gramps, my older and baby brother, and friends. There was Chester Rever, who my parents played poker with, my brother’s friend James, and my best friend, Percy Rever. Percy was a scarecrow-five feet tall, with gangly limbs and big hands and feet. His straw colored hair stuck out in all directions, and he was great at video games. They all stayed in our house, and Dad woke us all up at 7:00, even though our plane was scheduled for 11:00. We got there and had a whole two hours to wait, so me and Percy looked over our supplies. Dad had said to bring “essentials”, which I took to mean ‘Snacks and entertainment.” I didn’t think I’d worry about clothes.

Not for the first few days, anyway.

Eventually we saw our plane. It was an Antonov An-225, the biggest plane in the world. It had about three stories, and I was shocked. The tickets were first class, too.

Anyway, we got on the plane, and me and Percy gasped. The plane had those huge screens in the backs of the seats, and they were filled with video games like Call of Duty and Crime and Punishment and even Night of the Ninja Gorillas 3.They also had movies, and we soon found out that we could order free snacks.

However, trouble arose, as it often does. And it appeared in something that was both a blessing and a curse-the plane.

See, I had to go to the bathroom, as a result of ingesting copious amounts of soda. I walked seventeen steps to the bathroom, got in, did stuff you don’t want to know about, and then got out and walked to the row I was sharing with an old man and his puppet.

Huh?

Did I go to the wrong row? Nope. I checked. 4C2. I went back and forth up the whole isle. Nothing. The seats were more worn and weren’t made of leather. I didn’t know what to do, so I sat down in my seat when the old man looked at me and said “Trying to steal my old wife’s seat? You monster!” 

He then took a swing at mt with his cane. I climbed up the seat and jumped into the next row, onto the lap of a surly looking teenager. He yelled at me and swung a fist, so I left. The next row had three babies in it. Seriously. Three babies. All asleep. Luckily, I landed on the floor, not the seat, but even so they started crying. I looked behind me and the teenager and old man were following me. Oh boy. I turned on Loony Tunes for the babies before running to the next seat.

Well, it went like this until I finally took refuge in the snack tray that the stewardesses drive. It was a long, cold two days to Hawaii, let me tell you. I met up with my family because I was standing next to the stewardess that says goodbye as you go out the door. All the people that had chased me glared at me, including a few that hadn’t chased me but did it because everyone else was. I told my family my crazy story, but they didn’t believe me. I did some research online about the plane and found a small article on the airline’s website that they had put an “elevator bathroom” on the plane. Basically, it would go from business to economy class like an elevator. While I was in it, someone on the first floor of the plane had called it but never came for it when he found it was locked. 

So that was my flight to Hawaii. And if you think the actual vacation was any more chaotic than the flight, then boy, you are wrong.