okay Dusenvolt. challenge accepted. also I kind of stole the title from theodd1sout.

1. My Imagination.

Usually in the form of me being an epic fantasy hero slaying a dragon. Sadly that’s not real life

2. Creepy noises/the dark

Creepy noises are creepy. Once I thought I heard something whispering my name, but it was just me breathing. And what’s scary about the dark is you can’t see anything, and ordinary shapes are exaggerated into terrifying figures.

3. Books

I. Read. Too. Much. Often my parents will open the door and hiss, “Turn off the light! It’s (insert late hour here)!”

4. Counting Sheep

The classic suggestion for falling asleep that doesn’t work. I usually end up asking questions. Whose sheep are these? Why do I care about these sheep? Why do I count them manually? Am I being paid? And on and on.

5. Stories

Me and my brother download YouTube videos as mp3 files and listen to them. Game Theory rocks!

6. My brother

Often he will turn the light on and begin reading as I’m trying to sleep. I give up and turn on my light to read as he turns his off and tries to go to sleep. When I turn off my light he turns his back on. And so it goes…

7. Wondering Why

Why is milk white? Can milk get dirty? If the sea is ink, do writers live nearby? Is paper edible(yes, actually). What if I wake up the next morning in a time warp? WHAT IS REAL???

8. Snacks

Too many times I go downstairs and sneak a marshmallow or chocolate chips. I have problem.

9. Water & Ice

I drink huge cups of water and ice before going to bed, trusting myself to be a camel. Sadly, this doesn’t work and I have to use the facilities, but I’m pretty sure a clown with a knife is waiting in the bathtub. So I have to wait ’till morning.

10. Bad Jokes

A dyslexic walks into a bra

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot’s house. Knock knock. Who’s there? The chicken

A panda walks into a bar, orders a taco, eats it, fires a gun into the air, and then leaves. The bartender yells “Hey! What was that for?” The panda yells back “I’m a panda. Google me!”

Sure enough, “Panda: A large black and white bear found in Asia. Eats shoots and leaves.”